As I had mentioned earlier, the design company I had been working for these past 12 years, Brady Communications, closed its doors last week. The owner and founder John Brady had lost a three-year fight to cancer this February and the company couldn't move forward without him. It was a sad time for all of us, but as one of the long-time veterans, it was especially sad for me. I had been
Well, last night I had a dream that another design firm bought all the company assets (such as equipment and furniture) and was going to move into the space. And the new name was going to be (Something) Brady Communications. And they wanted me to work for them. But I wasn't crazy about the idea. And I wasn't crazy about the name of the new firm either. Without John Brady, or the employees, or the clients, there was no reason to keep Brady in the title. A company is more than just it's equipment, furniture, and space.
Well, I woke up, and immediately the dream made me think more about transiency. It both made me think how fragile a company is, and how that space we had inhabited for 12 years will soon be inhabited by a new client. It was quite unsettling. Somewhere this company and space concept relates somehow to reincarnation and the transmigration of souls. But it's not a perfect metaphor.
A more perfect metaphor is how we transmigrate within this life between different jobs, roles, situations, homes, etc. Leaving this company is just one of the many environments I have lived within, loved, and eventually left. Childhood family homes. Grandparents homes. Elementary and secondary schools. Summer camps. College. Being in and directing high school plays. Different workplaces. And summer vacation houses.
I even have bittersweet memories of a nearby video game store. I visited there very often for years, sometimes just to talk to the employees I got to know so well. But, eventually every one of those employees moved on. I still buy my games at that store, but the place doesn't feel the same.
Well, when I sat down at the computer this morning, one of the sites I visited was my new Twitter feed I had created last night to coincide with this blog. I followed a few spiritual tweeters. But I guess by mistake, I also followed Roger Ebert. Well, he had posted a link to a set of photographs a photographer had taken where a subject would pose in the same postion, clothes, and environment they had done in a childhood photograph. My immediate impression, of course, was sadness to see how much all these kids had grown up. Again with the transiency!
As you can see, I have a problem with change. Attatchment to people and places is definitely one of my strongest "attachments." I hate to leave people and places, and I hate to see people go. And as much as I am giving this leap of faith into Hinduism a go, I am not 100% convinced that reincarnation happens. So it is of no comfort. I still fear all the people I have lost, and will lose in the future, have or will cease to be. And the same goes for myself. I hope reincarnation is real. But until I believe it 100%, or some diving revelation happens, I will be subject to the winds of change.